Secret Agents
by DustyDreams
Summary: If Blaine is going to gush about Kurt, it should be at Kurt. This, at least, is how his best friends feel after three weeks of the non-stop Hummel network.


Written for the following Fluff_Meme prompt: Kurt is at lunch/out with assorted glee club members when he notices two guys in trench coats and sunglasses hiding behind newspapers etc. just really cheesy over the top spy stuff. Turns out to be Wes and David from Dalton, teasing Kurt about the terrible spying, they have come to 'kidnap' Kurt as Blaine will not stop talking about him and they are getting fed up of the mooning.  
I really want a cute friendship fic about Wes and David suffering, in a brotherly way, through Blaine constantly talking about Kurt, and Kurts delight and embarrasment about this being shared infront of the glee club. Also maybe including Kurt being taken to Blaine and Blaines mortification that Kurts been told about his behaviour?  
A million thank yous if anyone writes this or anything similar!

I couldn't pass it up.

"Don't eat the peas!" Artie announces after trying a single green ball and finding it to taste like can. Not canned. Can.

All the Gleeks comply, shoveling their vegetables onto the "This Tastes Too Bad For Words" plate at the center of the table. It's a tradition, another way the teammates look out for each other now that they all eat lunch together.

"Who wants to try the meatloaf?" Tina asks, deciding it won't be her.

"I'll go," Rachel pinches her nose between her thumb and index finger, and slides a small brown-gray chunk between her lips. She chews slowly, swallows with effort, contemplates, and decides, "Pallatable."

This is enough for the jocks, who dig into the (possibly) protein-packed item. The girls prefer to stick with their side salads, which though possible conduits for Ebola, actually taste like vegetables.

"This is better than a diet," Kurt lifts his destined-to-never-be-ripe pear and decides it will have to suffice.

That's when he sees them, sticking out like a sore thumb. Or, better yet, sticking out like two spies trying to get a peak at another school's glee club. He knows the look well. Though, these two have taken it to a whole new level: camel trenchcoats, dark sunglasses, and Dick Tracy fedoras. And they're standing in the far corner of the cafeteria, surveying.

They spot Kurt a few seconds after he spots them, which is kind of the opposite of what spies are supposed to do, and head over.

Kurt just stares at them, slack-jawed, because is this really happening?

Once they enter earshot, they lift their sleeves to their mouths and procede to talk into them.

"Suspect is spotted."

"Approaching with caution."

"Establishing contact."

By now, the rest of the club has noticed the visitors and are joining Kurt in that undignified gaze.

Puck is the first to break the silence, "What's up with these dudes?"

"This is Secret Agent Wesley Price, and I am Secret Agent David Wallace. Pleased to meet you." It's impossible to keep a straight face through that introduction, so they allow the smiles to take over and drop the personas.

"They're from the Dalton Academy Warblers," Kurt supplies. "I met them while I was over there spying, which, I believe, is where the hilarious ensemble stems from."

"We were going for endearing," Wes says with a wink as he removes his unecessary eyewear.

Kurt fights the desire to break out into ridiculous laughter, "Not that I'm not delighted to see you, but what is this about?"

"Your eyes," David starts in a mock-dreamy tone.

"And the fact that you can't quite tell if they're blue or green or silver."

"And the way your nose crinkles just slightly when you smile."

"And how your laughter sounds like music, but still pales in comparison to your singing."

"And how you dress like a GQ model and totally have the body for it."

Kurt has never blushed a deeper red, and as flattering as these words are, he'd really like them to stop. Did they have to be stated in front of the _entire_ Glee Club? Every single one of his friends? He's never going to hear the end of this.

"We like you, Kurt," Wes explains, "but if we have to hear Blaine go on about how you can almost touch your nose with your tongue and are the cutest thing in the world when you try, we are going to hold a grudge."

Kurt smacks his hand over his mouth, partly to keep anyone from imagining his tongue-based attempts, and partly because he's fairly certain this news about Blaine means something huge.

"So, we're kidnapping you, taking you to him. He's been too shy to tell you how he feels himself, so we're rectifying that."

The words slowly catch up with Kurt (because, honestly, he's still caught on the "Blaine likes my eyes?" part of this), "Kidnapping? Wait... now? I- I can't go now. I have school. We're only halfway through."

"If you can skip school to decorate your room, you can skip for this. Trust me."

The pain of that memory doesn't even come. He told Blaine that story (or, a shorter and happier version) and the only way David could be referring to it is if Blaine told him. 'Went on about it' to him. "He really does talk about me a lot?"

"You have _no idea_."

Kurt turns to Mercedes, the nervous expression of indecision painted on his face.

"Seriously? This is even a question for you?" she deadpans.

"I... my homework is in my locker-"

"Dude, I'll get it for you. Just go," Finn urges.

"Okay," Kurt agrees, breathless and dazed. "I'll go. I'll go to Blaine." But, he's still sitting there, pear in hand, the perfect statue of way too much anticipation.

"I think you need to stand first," Mike helps.

As Sam plucks the fruit from his fingers, Kurt nods and rises to his feet. His eyes are so wide he can't even blink.

And Blaine likes his eyes.

Wes returns his sunglasses to his face, "Now, if we play this right, we can pretend we're FBI agents and the teachers won't stop us."

It's a twenty minute drive and Kurt's knee bounces the whole way.

They pull up to the impressive Dalton Academy and Kurt walks way too quickly to be considered following. He knows where Blaine's room is and he'd very much like to be there now and if those two can't keep up that's their problem.

He's knocking on Blaine's dorm before Wes and David even round the corner in the hall, but Blaine must be in the middle of something because by the time he answers they're all there.

"Kurt!" he barely contains his gleeful surprise at seeing the boy, but his face takes on an air of suspicion as he notices his classmates and their outfits. "What did you do?"

"We kidnapped him and brought him to you."

"Now you can tell _him_ how amazing his hair is and how he smells like fresh apples."

Blaine's eyes widen as his words are played back at him with the subject _right there_. "What did you tell him?"

"You like my eyes," Kurt answers for them, "And I'm like music." Yeah, he's still rocking the Dazed and Amazed.

"We'll leave you two at that." Their trenchcoats flutter like capes as they disappear.

And it's just Blaine and Kurt.

"Kurt, they're..." he's about to say "idiots" and apologize for their behavior, but that would be like taking back everything they said, so he changes to, "totally right."

It didn't seem possible, but Kurt's smile actually grows.

Blaine is encouraged by the reaction, "Your eyes are amazing. I looked it up: it's called glasz, but you probably knew that because they're _your_ eyes. And your singing is beautiful. I'm so lucky you let me hear it. I'm happy when you're around and I'm always thinking about you. I really like you, Kurt."

Kurt lets the speech wash over him before stating the truest words he's ever spoken, "I like you, too."

Blaine has never been more grateful for his pushy, ridiculous friends.


End file.
